The Bryan Only Vince Cosmos TV Interview
BBC 2, August Bank Holiday Monday, 1972.
BO: And that was Vince Cosmos, darling of the air waves and
currently rocking his way through the concert halls of the land, with his brand
new hit single, ‘Nefarious.’
SCREAMS FROM AUDIENCE
BO: Come along and sit down here, Vincent. You don’t mind me
using your full name, do you?
VINCE: Uh, you can call me anything you like, Bryan. It’s an
honour to be on your show again.
BO: That was a tremendous reception for your new recording.
VINCE: Yeah, uh, it sure was, Bryan. But Vince Cosmos fans are
the best, you know. Whichever new musical direction I go in – they’re sure to
follow. They’re, you know, loyal as can be. They dig me, and uh – all my
musical peregrinations.
SHRIEKS
BO: That’s quite an ensemble you’re sporting this evening.
VINCE: I like to glam up for my fans. I scrub up all right, don’t
I? Do you think?
DELIRIOUS SCREAMS
BO: I think that means the young ladies and gentlemen of the
audience approve. I think you look rather like an eighteenth century dandy,
crossed with something from outer space.
VINCE: Ta very much.
MORE SCREAMS
BO: The show’s proving rather noisy tonight. You’ve attracted a
slightly different, more boisterous audience to the one I usually get, I must
say.
VINCE: Quite a hip crowd you’ve got in tonight, Bryan.
BO: We do our best, Vince. Now, I wonder if you’d all like to
see a clip of Vincent Cosmos’s first appearance on the The Bryan Only Show,
back in 1968?
VINCE:
What?
BO: We’ve been into the archive and unearthed a smashing little
bit of telecine of you before you were the space invader we know and love
today…
CUT TO – BLACK AND WHITE FILM CLIP.
BO: Hello there, young man. And you’re a protest singer too, are
you?
VINCE: I am indeed, Mr Only. My name is Aloysius Elven Wishbone
and my first record is released today!
BO: What’s its name?
VINCE: It’s called ‘Pixies All Around Me’.
BO: Smashing! I see you’ve brought your guitar with you,
Aloysius. Would you like to treat us to a song?
VINCE PLAYS PIXIES ALL AROUND ME
END OF CLIP
WILD APPLAUSE IN THE STUDIO
VINCE: Uh… that was a long time ago.
BO: Was ‘Pixies All Around Me’ a very big hit for you?
VINCE: Not really. I wish you’d talked to my management before
showing that… It was back when I was… uh, messing around with the idea of doing
like a concept album based around J.R.R Tolkien’s ‘The Hobbit’. But they
wouldn’t let me have the, you know, rights and stuff… so it just became this
kind of, uh, novelty song about a bunch of pixies.
BO: I hear your old record company is going to release it again,
cashing in on the current vogue for your good self?
VINCE: That’s just a pathetic rumour. No, that song has been
expunged from my back catalogue, Bryan.
BO: Pity, I found it rather catchy…
VINCE: I’m in a different place these days, Bryan. I don’t do
that pixie stuff no more.
SCREAMS
*
The fabulous VINCE COSMOS website is here courtesy of Bafflegab productions, who publish the audio play on cd on February the First. Head over and pre-order your copy now! (or on Amazon.)
TO BE PLAYED AT MAXIMUM VOLUME!
TO BE PLAYED AT MAXIMUM VOLUME!
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