Wednesday, 13 March 2019

Bernard Socks on Poetry




Bernard Socks on Poetry


1. Bernard Socks Responds to Criticism

I’m lying on his side of the bed
All day long
I’m deliberately shedding hair
And licking my asshole

Absolutely furious

Jeremy didn’t like my last poem
‘As much’ he said
‘As your previous work.’

Well
Let it piss down
All day
Let it piss down on him
Smoking outside
What does he know anyway
About cat poems?




2. Bernard Socks Reflects on Form and Content

What I’m saying
At the end of the day
Is that I’m a cat
And I guess that’s the stuff I write about

It’s gonna reflect
Cat-type concerns
Catty kind of stuff

And you might think my world is narrow
(I think it’s huge)
And you might think
It doesn’t touch on wider themes
(It does)
And you might think my appreciation of
Poetic form, rhythm, metre, etc
Is rudimentary
(Ha!)

But this is what you get
When you ask
The cat what he thinks



3. Bernard Socks on Editing

Revising poems
Is a bit like chewing your feet
Teasing gravel chunks
From between your toes

Licking all your fur down
So it lies smartly
Smarming in the cat spit
And chewing on your nipples

You have to check every line
Taste it
Give them a careful niff niff niff
Seeing that they sit straight

Do they lie sleekly in the same direction?
Can you twist your neck around
And lick
That bothersome idea
Perfectly into shape?

Cats like being succinct
They don’t hang around
Say what you’ve gotta say

See you later, losers.



4. Bernard Socks at the Open Mic

“I’m not sure if this will work in performance
Me being more of a language poet
And all
But
Here goes:

“Weeeeee-

ooooooooo
Weeeeeeeee-

OOOO

OO                                    OOOOO

RRrrrr  rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Rrr

MOW
MOW
MOW
MOW

Ungow!

Weee

ee-oooo

MOW
MOW
MOW

Rrrrrr.”




5. Bernard Socks on Humankind

Sleepy cat
Are humans daft?

Yeah, humans are daft
All right

Humans are crazy.










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